Setting
A typical courtyard in a small town, situated between two parallel five-story buildings made of silicate brick from the 1970s. A slide shaped like a rocket, a wall made of sticks with rings, a little playhouse, a sandbox, benches, balconies—often glazed and frequently cluttered—mature trees, cats, stray dogs, cracked asphalt with grass growing through the cracks, and a lawn that has been trampled down to clay, losing all signs of life back in the last century. A garbage shed, a setting sun, birds, sparse clouds, and cars parked along the buildings with one wheel on the “lawn.”
Characters
- Tolik: A moderately plump, short man, a veteran and combat officer, looking to be around 35 years old.
- Andrey: Tolik’s son. A boy who turned 10 years old on this day. Quite clever.
- Seryozha. Tolik’s friend. He’s also a combat officer. But he drinks less beer, so he’s slimmer than Tolik and a couple of inches taller.
- The guys: A group of boys who pulled into a quiet courtyard just to sit in the car and drink. So that no one would bother them. The car is a white VAZ 2106, apparently belonging to one of the guys’ grandfather.
- A number of observers around the scene and on the balconies.
- Two intelligent ladies, Valya and Lena, are teachers on one of the balconies. They are also observers.
Action
Andrei had a birthday, and Tolik, wanting to fulfill his son’s long-held dream, bought him a firework. It was a type of rocket launcher with several shots that needed to be secured vertically and lit. The news of the free fireworks quickly spread throughout the yard, gathering onlookers who watched eagerly as preparations were made.
After unpacking the fireworks, it became clear that they needed to be secured to something, and Andrey told his dad that they should tie it with wire. Tolik, without even considering listening to the boy, said that there was no wire, but there was duct tape. As you can imagine, if there had been wire or if Tolik had set aside his pride and listened to his son, the story would have been shorter.
So, the rocket launcher was taped to one of the bars of the slide and lit. The first three shots shot up into the sky accompanied by loud cheers from the spectators. Then the duct tape came into play, either melting or simply losing its strength from the heat of the launcher. The rocket launcher fell to the ground and started firing in different directions, changing its aim due to the recoil from the previous shot.
The first shot hit under the car with the guys and exploded right underneath it. To say that the guys who had chosen a quieter spot were surprised would be an understatement. However, the other onlookers, thanks to the tinting, still hadn’t seen the guys in the car and continued to watch the fireworks with even greater interest.
At that moment, Valyuchka, a teacher sent from heaven, an intelligent woman in her middle years, watching the unfolding events from the balcony, exclaimed, “Oh, damn… Sorry, Lenochka, it just slipped out.” Meanwhile, Lenochka, standing nearby with her mouth agape, was watching as the next shot, in slow motion, flew towards a group of onlookers, among whom was her son. The children, however, didn’t lose their composure and all jumped up together, allowing the charge to pass beneath them, crashing into the wall of the house and blooming into a beautiful firework, scattering colorful sparks all around.
At that moment, the firework, seemingly thinking that it was wasting its entertainment potential, turned around and shot off in such a way that the blast ricocheted off the sandbox and flew into the window of the second floor, shattering the glass, entering the room, exploding, and igniting the curtains. The firework could take pride in the effect it had created, as after that, no one remembered whether there were any more shots or not. Although there were indeed more shots, and one of them hit the door of the bank located in the semi-basement of one of the five-story buildings.
Valya, with her round eyes, began to wail, “Oh, what should we do? Yes, we need to call the fire department or… no, it’s better not to call the fire department or… or… call the fire department…” It’s important to understand that life has taught people that it’s best not to get involved with government agencies. Lena’s thoughts were racing in her head like a troop of monkeys under a tree where a snake had appeared: darting left and right, shrieking in panic.
Apparently, to illustrate Lena’s train of thought, just like a troop of monkeys, Tolik and Seryozha started running around below, shouting and dragging some onlookers into their game. The comicality of the scene was heightened by the difference in proportions between Tolik and Andrey. And the fire was spreading. After a couple of runs back and forth, they figured out to dash into the entrance. Yes, the whole crowd. A minute later, they burst out of the entrance just as they had entered, since there was no one in the apartment. As it turned out later, the elderly woman living there, a pensioner, had gone to visit her relatives for the weekend.
What should we do next? That’s right! Run back and forth while screaming. And we also need to grab our heads. That’s the most effective way.
At that moment, the door of a white VAZ 2106 opens, and a guy about 20 years old steps out. He calmly approaches the entrance where the panicking officers are running around, stops Sergey, the taller one, and before he can recover from such a brazen interruption of his productive activity, he pushes him toward the awning above the entrance. Climbing up Sergey, who is still in shock, he makes his way along the gas pipe to the balcony, breaks the glass with his hand, goes inside, and puts out the curtains.
The panic subsided, the boy was helped down, Valya ran downstairs and expertly bandaged his cut arm, having recently completed the relevant courses. Everyone thanked the hero, who still couldn’t relax in the company of his friends. Tolik took his son Andrey, who was already dreaming about how he would tell his classmates everything later, by the hand, and together with his buddy Seryozha, they headed to the kiosk for some beer.
At that moment, a police UAZ pulled into the yard. Tolik told Andrey that it would be better to surrender voluntarily, and the three of them walked over to the UAZ. The police officers, after getting out of the car, approached the bank where, apparently, the alarm had gone off. They checked to see that nothing was broken and everything was in order, then turned around, got back in their vehicle, and drove away, reversing down the narrow path in the yard, past the watchful gazes of Tolik, Andrey, and Seryozha, leaving our heroes without a chance for a heartfelt confession.
As it turned out later, the people were united, and no one called anyone, and the matter was hushed up. They found the keys at the neighbors’ house, and Andrei’s wife contributed some new curtains from her stash. Tolik went to the market and got new glass cut. Meanwhile, Lenochka offered him to take her old ones, which would fit the standard frames for these houses perfectly, but Tolik was principled; he wanted to pay for what he had done himself, apparently ritually making a sacrifice to the god of luck, with whom he seemed to have some old grievances. He went to the market twice to get the glass cut—once to get it cut, and the second time to get it cut correctly.
They explained everything to Grandma, who would have been surprised by the change in curtain styles, and she agreed that “it’s better this way.”
Trampled grass, grass growing through cracks in the asphalt, mature trees, the sun, birds, and stray dogs basking in the sunlight.