There has been a wave of publications in boarding schools regarding research by ethologists on teaching primates to use money. Monkeys quickly grasp the abstract concept of money and are willing to work, provide services—including intimate ones—for money, and even fight with their peers or work tirelessly for it. It all depends on the personality of each individual macaque. Some will choose to work, some to steal, and others to “provide services.”
And now imagine that all these experiments, which were conducted solely for articles in journals and other publications, could actually be implemented in real life.
There are plenty of jobs and, ahem, services that could be offered by animals for money. From trash collection in forests to military reconnaissance, and from earthworks to postal services. Monkeys, crows, beavers—all could earn a living. If they can earn money, then there also needs to be exchange points where these animals can trade their money for useful items. Primates and crows, capable of sharing knowledge with one another, could very well be allowed, after some training, to enter real stores with real money.
And now, instead of foraging for food for themselves, they would work for people, obtaining sustenance for themselves and their children much more efficiently than if they were still relying on wild food.
Here you are, standing in line at the supermarket. In front of you is a female baboon with a baby on her back. She’s already wearing shoes, having come north for work where the pay is better, and she needs to somehow cope with the cold and the salty slush outside. She’s got a wallet with her. Someone taught her, or she figured it out herself. She even has a baby stroller. And she’s buying muesli, milk, bananas, butter, and even cooked sausage. Why not? And she doesn’t live on the street; she stays in some civilized monkey house that used to be a dormitory.
Have you already figured out what the next thought is?